Do You Want To Cultivate A Relationship That Lasts?
Are you and your partner engaged to be married or considering moving in together and want to know that you’re making the right choice? Are you experiencing doubts or tension and wonder if these feelings are a normal part of making a significant life change? Perhaps you question if you’re making your decision out of fear rather than desire.
Or, maybe you are confident in your decision, but want to ensure that you take this next big step thoughtfully. Even if you feel connected and solid in your relationship right now, has an increase in arguments as the big day approaches caused you to worry that things might get worse? Do you want to build a foundation that will last through the ups and downs of life? Are you seeking the tools, skills and connection needed to ensure that your relationship will be sustainable and successful?
Taking a big step in a relationship, such as deciding to share a home or join your lives through marriage, can be an exciting and hopeful time, but it can also come with tension, uncertainty and confusion. Although you may love your partner deeply, you might still fear that he or she will call off the engagement or that, regardless of your intentions now, your relationship will end in a painful separation or divorce. These fears can be compounded if you’ve been hurt in the past or watched your parents or other loved ones struggle through a challenging breakup. Even if you are certain about your commitment, you still may wonder if you and your partner are in alignment when it comes to values, parenting styles and how you will manage finances. And, if there are already apparent differences, you may be seeking the skills and tools needed to manage these and other issues effectively, as they will inevitably come up in your future life together.
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Many Loving Couples Seek Premarital Counseling
When in the throes of wedding preparation or making a big move, many couples get caught up in the thrill of planning. During this “honeymoon” stage of a relationship, the endorphins of love and the busy pace of life can cause many couples to put off talking about the problems that may exist in the relationship.
Today, the millennial generation is getting married later in life than any generation previously. Reasons to postpone marriage include the desire to advance in careers and achieve financial stability first. In addition, many millenials witnessed their parents or other family members struggle with the pain of divorce. As a result, divorce rates are lower than their 1980s peak.
Premarital counseling is on the rise, too, and not just for this younger generation. Older couples who have been divorced or experienced long-term relationships that ended are also being proactive and seeking premarital counseling. By taking the time to explore their relationships and learn valuable communication and conflict resolution skills early on, these couples have a greater chance of achieving long-term success. In fact, studies indicate that couples who engage in premarital counseling decrease their chance of divorce by 30 percent.
Premarital Counseling Can Provide You And Your Partner With The Skills, Insights And Connection Needed For A Successful Marriage
In safe, nonjudgmental and engaging premarital counseling sessions, you and your partner can not only begin laying the bricks of a solid relationship foundation and learning valuable skills, but you can also connect more deeply and get to know each other even better. Your experienced and compassionate West Hartford Holistic Counseling Center therapist can help you prepare for a long and successful relationship.
Working collaboratively, your therapist can help you and your partner access your strengths as a couple as well as identify your opportunities for growth. Sessions are a safe place for both you and your partner to express any doubts or concerns. Rather than push these fears aside now, only to have them magnified later, you can learn how to talk through difficult feelings as a couple and come to thoughtful and sustainable compromises and resolutions. Doing so now cannot only strengthen your relationship and provide you both with valuable communication skills, but it can also increase self-awareness and give you each a better understanding of one another.
As you develop the skills needed to effectively navigate conflict – which can be used immediately to help you through wedding planning and orchestrating a significant move – you can begin really working as a team. In the times that you bump up against conflict, you’ll know how to shift fights into conversations and work toward resolution. As you engage in the premarital process and make sense of your issues, your therapist can also help you to create balance in your relationship and provide you both with an atmosphere of mutual respect.
By being proactive and seeking support now, you and your partner can gain the skills, insights and connection needed to create a beautiful, long-term life together.
Although you may be interested in the idea of premarital counseling, you still may have questions or concerns about the process…
As our wedding day grows closer, the tension between us has grown, too. I’m worried that talking will make things worse.
Whether or not you name the issues in your relationship, they still exist. And, not talking about them allows them to fester and grow, inevitably creating more distance between you and your partner. While it may feel difficult and even a little scary to talk openly about underlying issues at first, doing so can promote closeness and help you build a strong foundation at the onset of your marriage. And, you’ll have the help of a skilled and experienced therapist to help guide you through challenging conversations.
How long does premarital counseling take?
Premarital counseling is generally not a lengthy process, and while some couples decide to continue couples counseling long-term, others complete in the process in just six sessions. This short-term work is designed to provide you with the skills and insights needed to cultivate a strong and secure long-term marriage or relationship.
Everything is perfect right now. Do we really need this type of counseling?
During the honeymoon stage it is not uncommon to feel that love will conquer all. While it may seem hard to believe now, this euphoric love stage will end and the issues of normal life will creep in. Most couples wait until issues are almost unmanageable before they come into therapy and start learning the skills needed to maintain a long-term connection. By engaging in premarital counseling, you’re setting yourselves up for success. When life starts throwing you curve balls, which it inevitably will, you and your partner will have built a strong foundation and have the tools needed to navigate challenges as a thoughtful, connected team.
You Can Find Relief And Healing
Please contact our office for a free 15-minute phone consultation. We look forward to discussing your unique needs and answering any questions you have about anxiety treatment and our approach and practice.
In addition to being a private pay practice, we take Anthem Blue Cross, Aetna, Husky, Optum, United, Medicare and Medicaid insurances.